When God Says “No”

What should we ask when God has not granted our request? We might follow the following biblical path.

1. Did I actually ask? “you do not have because you do not ask.” (James 4:2) While this is rare, sometimes we have simply not prayed, or not prayed specifically enough.
2. Is sin involved? “If I regard iniquity in my heart, The Lord will not hear.” (Psalm 66:18) Is what I’m asking for sinful in nature? Or is there some kind of unconfessed, harboured sin in my life that can hinder prayer (1 Pet. 3:7)?
3. Am I asking selfishly? “You ask and do not receive, because you ask amiss, that you may spend it on your pleasures.”(James 4:3) Do I desire something that excludes the glory of God, or will be a defiant, godless use of a pleasure with no thought of God, His church or eternity?
4. Am I asking with a double mind? “For let not that man suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways.” (James 1:7–8) That is, am I asking without trusting and submitting to the form of answer God gives? Do I want to follow Jesus on my own terms (Luke 9:57-62) or keep allegiances to the world as a back-up if I don’t like God’s answer?
5. Am I asking and doing the will of God? “And whatever we ask we receive from Him, because we keep His commandments and do those things that are pleasing in His sight. (1 John 3:22) 
   • Asking: Is this request in Scripture as a precept or principle?
   • Asking: Have I gathered information to inform the decision/request?
   • Asking: Is it confirmed by wise counsel?
   • Asking: Have I asked for wisdom without doubting?
   • Asking: Is my conscience at peace with asking?
   • Doing: Have I neglected to do my duties while waiting for God’s “yes”?
   • Doing: Am I asking God to give me what He expects me to work for, initiate, or pursue?
6. Would this lead me into temptation? “And do not lead us into temptation” (Matt. 6:13)
   • Am I asking for something to be immediate that usually requires progressive growth?
   • Is my character ready to receive God’s “yes”? Would I become more Christlike were this granted?
   • Would God’s “yes” amount to special treatment or exemption from something most of God’s children have to face?
7. Is God’s “no” producing more fruit in my life than His “yes” would? “Concerning this thing I pleaded with the Lord three times that it might depart from me. And He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. (2 Corinthians 12:8–9) If God’s delay or “no” brings more of His empowering grace, it may be that it is more beneficial for my soul, in the long run.